Thursday, 23 January 2014

i don't have a scale that works, well to be truthful the one in the kitchen says it goes to 330 but when i get on it the numbers go all weird blinking frantically in a panic cause its being crushed to death. I went to my friend Jo's house (the choc-blocker) and stood there in disbelief in front of their scale........I LOST 11 POUNDS!!! i went from 333 to 321.6 ! WOW.

This result is after a week and a half, i started weight watchers last monday and after 10 days of being a committed and focused, this is my reward! yeeeeeehhhhh! i realize and have heard many many times that you get bug numbers at first when you have big to lose, i am fine with that...as long as i see some sort of reduction then i am over the moon with happiness! My fiance lost seven!! we are kickin' ass and takin' names at this thing!

so, amidst the euphoria, there have been challenges. but i have not changed anything but diet. i still sit most of my day wedding planning...er...i mean working on my Phd...and i know its typical of anybody in their first few weeks of weight loss to be overly optimistic but i am! i really am! i am turning around a lifestyle that is damaging me physically, emotionally and spiritually. i will stick this out and i will be where i want to be...

on this uplifting positive note, bye for now :)

~madameO

Friday, 17 January 2014

Captains log, day five of weight watchers. Urge to go to Mary Brown's and lay in the deep fryer rising. possible trip to Menchies after to fill all my pockets with froyo for later...

actually, i feel pretty damned good. and yes, it's been FOREVER since i've been on here but here's the new plan. weight watchers for a year. yep. a year. its been five days and honestly, doable. totally doable. hard, of course but not impossible and seriously i can do it. i'm not starving all the time, i'm not headachy and i feel good. no more excuses.

i was looking at the pictures of myself and yikes, i mean effin yikes...what is my ass doing? ew...its ok! i'm working on it, i just feel bad for anyone having to follow behind me when i heave myself onto the bus...man, it's been like months since i've written. i like the catharsis of getting it out to the void. "it" being my feelings and daily lived experience of living as a manatee...

last time i wrote on here i was recently choc blocked by a friend at the grocery store. i reached for a candy bar and she literally slid over in front of it! lol...that's the support i need right now. when i'm stressed i eat, when i'm unhappy i eat, hell, when i'm happy i eat. i love food. but i do not love asking for the extender belt on a plane so here i am, day five on weight watchers. and i'm not paying $ for it, through the helpful resources of the free calculator and my fiance answering me EVERY repetitive time i ask how many points an egg is, it is surprisingly easy to keep track of my 41 points allowed. originally i was given 51 points on WW which i thought was absurd cause, honestly, who gets 51 points to eat...so i found a happy medium recommendation for 41. on day five i've learned a few things so far: i used to eat way way way too much, i have more will power than i thought and i would run someone over with a shopping cart if there was only one box of white chocolate drizzled caramel popcorn thinsations left to grab...

first weigh in on monday, i'll let ya know...

<3 Madame O